Projects, Projects, Projects!

I always think it’s better to have too much work than not enough. Maybe that’s why I get myself so involved in projects.

I’m very happy that my new agent is trying to find a home for a series I dreamed up awhile back, the Texas Festival Mysteries. I envision my sleuth driving her Cookie Cart (a cookie food truck) from one Texas festival to the next, selling cookies that are themed to the celebration. Let me tell you, Texas has enough strange and wonderful festivals to keep that series going for many years to come. Like this one!

Meanwhile, I turned the second Vintage Sweets mystery, DEADLY SWEET TOOTH, in to my editor at Lyrical Press. That series will also take place in Texas, but will mostly stay rooted in lovely touristy Fredericksburg, nestled in amongst a lot of wineries in picturesque Texas Hill country.

Meanwhile, I’m working on a short story to submit to an upcoming anthology with a deadline looming very soon.

Meanwhile, I need to tell you about an exciting event coming up the last Sunday of this month—a radio broadcast about me! A short piece about me and my work will be read by Jody Sims on WUOT, the local public radio station. The program is called TheAuthors Page and comes on at 8:35 am EST. But don’t worry, they shows are all recorded and can be heard any time.

Most of the programs are about famous TN writers. These were written by the member of the Authors Guild of Tennessee, of which I’m a member. (I wrote one of the scripts that will appear later.) Check out some of these while you’re there. The broadcasts are short, about five minutes. The last Sunday of the month, however, is devoted to telling you about the members of our group. And mine is coming up this month!

 all photos are mine

Remember to never split an infinitive

This is the last of the William Safire writing “rules” for me. I’ve had such fun considering them. We all know how bogus this one is, right? Every since Star Trek: To boldly go where no (man/one) has gone before. The latter, “one,” for Next Generation, since they finally realized that there were women along and they hadn’t been there before either.

I’ve read that the origin of rules like this stem from Latin scholars, or maybe just snobs. It’s impossible to split an infinitive in Latin, since they are only one word. Esse, amare, videre, regere, audire (to be, to love, to see, to rule, to hear). Okay, but just because you can’t split them in Latin, doesn’t mean you can’t split them in English. Ours are TWO words. You can always split two words. I’m always eager to find places to happily break this rule. Which, it seems, never was a rule.*

Go ahead, cleave those infinitives, if it makes sense in your context!

*https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/split-infinitives

axe photo from morguefile.com

Do not put statements in the negative form.

This is William Safire’s third rule of grammar. Two more to go.

Here’s the late, great Ella, telling us about it. 

Using the advice, the title, above, would be: Put statements in the positive form.

Right? Okay, but don’t we have to use negative statements sometimes? I honestly don’t know what this one is about.

But I did some research on negation and found some esoteric things.

Like, the subtle difference between these two statements:

      (1) I don't think [that he came] (I don't know what he did)
          (2) I think [that he didn't come] (I think that he stayed away)

And these not-so-subtly different statements:

      (1) I didn't say [that he lied] (I said nothing)
          (2) I said [that he didn't lie] (I said that he told the truth)

The above are taken from:

https://www.thoughtco.com/negation-in-grammar-1691424

Any more thoughts on this?

Verbs has to agree with their subjects

This is William Safire’s fourth rule of grammar. (I have three left, then I’ll have to start thinking up new blog topics.)

What do you think? Does this drive you crazy? It does me!

Easy examples:

wrong:  The girls has talked to me.

right: The girls have talked to me.

wrong: We talks to the girls.

right: We talk to the girls.

The slightly obscure, to some people, examples are the problems.

wrong: Neither of them have talked to me.

right: Neither of them has talked to me.

Neither is singular and it’s the subject.

wrong: Janet and Kaye has both talked to me.

right: Janet and Kaye have both talked to me.

Both talked, so plural.

wrong: Janet or Kaye have talked to me.

right: Janet or Kaye has talked to me.

Only one talked, so singular.

Which one here is wrong or right?

The girls talked to me.

The girl talked to me.

AHA, doesn’t matter here.

I took some of this from here:

https://webapps.towson.edu/ows/moduleSVAGR.htm

Proofread carefully to see if you words out.

This one is important!

A fellow performer (I’m a classical violinist) once told me, after a concert, that there is no such thing as a perfect performance. I keep that in mind every time I play, give a talk, or write a book.

My opinion is that no one has ever published a perfect book. No matter how many proofreaders you employ, editors you hire, times you go over your deathless prose, a mistake can slip through—and often does.

I have my own methods for trying to catch as many as I can. I’m a fast, careless typist, so there are quite a few to catch. Beta readers are a must for me, as are critique groups when I have time.

Here’s my best tool. I open my document in one screen, and have my computer read it on another one. ReadPlease software used to be free and that’s what I still use. I can paste several pages of text into it at a time, then follow along on the other screen while it reads to me. When I catch something, I pause it, correct, and resume the reading.

I think reading aloud might serve the same purpose, but I think my voice would wear out if I were doing a novel.

Do you have good methods for proofreading? Something others could use?

A writer must not shift your point of view.

I’m a big fan of this one! I know there are popular (VERY popular) writers who shift POV within scenes, within paragraph, sometimes within sentences. For the life of me, though, I can’t figure out how to read those writers.

I have to use clean POV for my own sanity. If I’m in Mary’s head, there has to be a break before I hop over to Jane’s head. It can be a new scene. Or it can be the same scene repeated from an alternate POV. I kind of like to do those when I can manage them.    

first photo from morguefile.com lauramusikanski

second photo from morguefile.com kconner

Beginnings and Endings

And don't start a sentence with a conjunction. (Remember, too, a preposition is a terrible word to end a sentence with.)

What do you think? Are these so terrible? And if so, why?

Okay, I’ll admit to doing this a whole lot in some first drafts. And in subsequent drafts, to, if I’m honest with you. But sometimes you have to start with the conjunction. That’s all there is to it.

As for ending with a preposition? There’s the ironic definition of a preposition is "A word you mustn't end a sentence with." Besides, this is actually a bogus rule. Another example of trying to equate English to Latin. You can’t do it in Latin, but you sure can in English. And there’s nothing wrong with it. Just like there’s nothing wrong with splitting infinitives.

The preposition prohibition began in the 1600s and has been continued, incredibly, ever since then. Here are thoughts on it. http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/004454.html

 photos from morguefile.com

Don't overuse exclamation marks!!

This is a perpetual topic for writers. There are a surprising number of discussions on different topics relating to these.

First of all, is it a point or a mark?

Both, I guess. I don’t know which is preferred.

Next, can you use more than one in a row, such as in the title of this blog?

“Never use multiple exclamation points in a professional setting!!! Again, this is fine to use in informal and personal context, however most professionals agree that there should be ONE end punctuation mark to each sentence. Professionally, it doesn't reinforce the exclamation, it just breaks grammatical rules.”

https://purduecco.wordpress.com/2012/02/07/overused-exclamation-points/

(Strange boldings there, if you ask me.)

(Really, though, this whole article is good if you want to delve.)

(The article below says that if you’re going to use more than one, use three, never two.)

(I wonder how many parentheses in a row are too many.)

When should you use them and not use them in fiction writing?

Not for emphasis, hilarity, or excitement.

Use the writing to give emphasis and excitement. And using them to be funny is like laughing at your own joke. Or so this site says:

https://www.helpingwritersbecomeauthors.com/exclamation-points/

It also says you should use them for:

Raised voices, to make fun of characters, and in writing for children.

Okay, raised voices, I’ll go along with that.

The expanded explanation on the second one is to make sure the reader knows that what you wrote isn’t serious. I’m not sure how this is different than laughing at your own joke, but whatev!

And for children? You know, it’s hard to get them to use those inside voices. Maybe that should be rethought.

Here’s what Elmore Leonard famously said:

“Keep your exclamation points under control. You are allowed no more than two or three per 100,000 words of prose." 

photo from morguefile.com

Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.

Probably a good idea, mostly, unless you’re backloading. 

Do you know about backloading? It’s an effective way to end a scene or chapter. From a course I gave in Atlanta in October of 2016, here’s an example:

A feeling of dread came over me as I opened the door. (Then you viciously cut to another scene and leave them hanging.)

Better would be this:

As I opened the door, I was overcome with an inexplicable feeling of dread.

Door is not the most important or evocative word in that cliffhanger sentence. Dread is so it needs to go last to leave an impression. Of course, in this case, dread is not a pronoun. Let me see if I can come up with a backloaded sentence splitting the pronoun from the antecedent.

How about this?

The boys, tiring after hours of seeking a way out of the dark, dank cave, felt the warmth and wetness of their own tears.

Can you think of better ones?

backhoe photo by Dan Zen from Flickr through http://www.everystockphoto.com/

Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.

This one drives me nuts! Unlike the William Safire “rules” I’ve posted before, you really should NOT do this.

Unless you’re entering this contest.

http://sinandsyntax.com/blog/dangling-modifiers/

Here’s a sampling from the page:

“I found a dollar walking home.” I wonder where the dollar lives.

“Walking past the cemetery, an open coffin frightened me.” An open coffin walking around would scare me, too.

“Hopping from foot to foot, the crosstown bus came into view.” I didn’t even know buses had feet!

Another amusement source for these can be headlines.

http://forums.prohealth.com/forums/index.php?threads/dangling-participles-goofy-headlines-etc-know-any.248858/

Here are a few of these:

Dealers will Hear Car Talk at Noon—I’d show up for that. I wonder if David Hasselhoff will be there.

Juvenile Court Tries Shooting Defendant—I hope the court missed. Poor kid.

Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim—Ouch!

I hope you had fun with these.

photo from morguefile.com