I asked myself that question after I reviving a mental health help that I last used just about exactly a year ago. My crutch is a Worry List. I started it when my husband was ill and dying and I was worrying all day every day. When I put my concerns and issues on a list—actually wrote it out, I found I could read my Worry List once a day, give myself some fretting time, then spend the rest of the day less concerned. It worked, well enough anyway.
Last year at this time it held things like Covid, our
political problems, the condition of my yard, my failing car, and some red
spots that were on my carpet.
This year it’s more like, Covid, the impending destruction
of the planet, the looming demise of democracy worldwide. You know, actual apocalyptic
stuff.
Which led me to these two questions: What is actually broken?
But, more importantly, what is not broken? Maybe the concentration should be on
the latter. There’s plenty there. What would my Non Worry List look like? The
things I don’t have to worry about. Thing that don’t weigh me down.
I always start with this one. I am above ground, one more
day.
I have three health children and their spouses, plus seven
healthy grandkids, all of whom get together and love each other, and love me.
And I love them.
I am able to do something I wanted to do all of my life,
without impediments—write novels and short stories and actually get them
published and read.
The community I belong to, mystery writers, are the best
people, as a group, on the planet. I firmly believe that. They are wonderful,
supportive, kind, helpful—just everything you need from a support group and a
bunch of colleagues.
These are way down on this list, but they are not
unimportant. I had a house with heat and AC. I have enough food. I have
medicine when I need it. I have all the clothing I need and the ability to buy
more when I feel like it. The basics, right? Food, clothing, shelter.
What’s on your Worry List? But, better yet, what’s on your
Non-Worry List? One might even call it a List of Things to Be Thankful For.
Image of weight by Castlelass at Morguefile
Image of balloons by davide25 from Pixabay
I hear you. I worked on a piece and put it aside many times. Finally published "The Art of Deliberate Distraction: or When to Wiggle Your Toes" last fall. You might find it helpful. I am also a big believer in gratitude lists. The idea of this short piece is that it is okay to consciously focus on things beside problems you can't address or resolve. I tend to write with a bit of humor, and put a novella with it because The Art of DD is short. Only 99 cents, or let me know if you'd be interesed in a (free) pdf version. I found it helpful to write.
ReplyDeleteIt couldn't hurt, right? That's a very kind offer! Thanks. Do you need my email? kayegeorge at gmail dot com.
DeleteWise words. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome. I feel like I'm babbling, but it's nice to hear that. :)
DeleteI mean, you would have said it eloquently.
DeleteThis is such a thoughtful article. I’m sorry you’ve had so many worries. They just have to be worked through, is what I think. One foot in front of another. It sounds as if you’re surrounded by good people. Nothing is better than that.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I'm not happy if I don't have something to worry about. It's my super power. I AM amid so many good people, friends and relatives.
ReplyDeleteI enjoy reading your books! And I appreciate this post, as I share your worries too! Appreciate your sense of humor concerning it all. Thank you, Ms. George, for the reminder to appreciate our many blessings along the way!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Ellen. Not only for your kind comments, but for reading my books!
Delete